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Posts Tagged ‘TechnoScouse’

Number 50- Words of wisdom, and a few too many sherbets

Saturday, October 17th, 2009
Smoking Monkeys.co.uk

Something a little different today, as it’s been a long week full of thrills, spills, and indeed spectacular triumphs over Greater Manchester Police who single handedly failed to get my client convicted. Oh yes, can’t beat it when a bench of Magistrates don’t believe the evidence of 5 police officers! Given that they didn’t believe my client either (as the dopey little twerp had managed to completely change his story between 9am and 12), I’m afraid that I really must take the credit.

I’m sorry, there is no other explanation. Fact.


World of Warcraft…

Friday, March 9th, 2007
smoking monkeys blog

Well I’m sure that many of you will have read my review of Final Fantasy before, so it seems only right and fair that I start gearing up for a similar all-encompasing review of World of Warcraft (WOW)

First, I must confess that I am now a fully paid up player of this online phenomenon. I received a call from TS one day at work, which simply told me (not asked, told) that after I had picked her up we were off to Gamestation to buy 2 copies of WOW. I was less than enthusiastic, despite the excellent episode of South Park where they play it. I won’t go into details, just try to find it on YouTube or something. Dutifully, I did as told, and £30 later I was then proud owner of 2 copies of the same game (as required) and had taken the brave step of letting TS have my credit card details.


Perhaps a new name for Techno Scouse

Thursday, February 22nd, 2007
smoking monkeys blog

Well, it’s been a while since I’ve been on here. There are about 3 blog drafts that I started, but just couldn’t be arsed finishing off. Then, TS and I had the great joy of moving house. I will probably go into detail another time about that, bu for now I just want o try and get back into the habit of posting for my small fan-base.

And todays subject is something close to my heart… Techno Scouse. However, I am considering renaming her for blog purposes to Nibbler, after the strange small creature with pointy teeth and an appetite for destruction on Futurama. I probably don’t need to say much more to justify that change, other than to explain why TS may not be suitable any more.


Damn I'm good

Wednesday, January 31st, 2007
smoking monkeys blog

Well, it’s days like today that really reassure me that I’m in the right line of business. At the same time, it also presented me with a huge moral/professional conduct problem.

I was representing a client in the police station, and had no idea what he was accused of. He is a friend of one of our “regular” clients, so frankly it could have been anything from hijacking trucks to carrying knives.

So… I turn up at the guy’s house (because clients are always worried they will be remanded and have to arrange for someone to take their car home), and after he has filled a bag with assorted things we are off.


Great excitement

Monday, January 29th, 2007
smoking monkeys blog

Today, my ever-loving Techno Scouse staggered out of work with her sparkly new Alienware laptop. Ever since I have known TS, Alienware has been equated with the Holy Grail filled with a combination of the elixer of eternal youth and a cure for the common cold. She has now got one, courtesy of her extremely generous company bonus scheme so life is good.

What was strange, however, was the thing she was actually excited about. On the way home, she turned to me, with big wide-eyed joy and said “Guess what’s happening a week on Thursday?”